Friday, December 19, 2014

Slowly getting there

Christmas is days away and I feel so absolutely unprepared. Thank god I did most of my shopping before the baby arrived.  Between that and online shopping I think I have managed to cover most of my gift giving needs.

We decided to do photos of the kids for Christmas.  Partly in an attempt on my part to appear normal, and feel normal.  I am really pushing myself to do two things every day.  Fold laundry.  Clean out a junk drawer.  Clean the bathroom sink.  Teensy baby steps towards finding my old self again.

When you have the first baby there is a sea of visitors following the baby's arrival.  They come armed with lasagna and gifts, and it's a heartwarming way to not only welcome the new baby but also to ensure that the new mother puts lipstick on and gets out of bed.

With a second child visitors are few and far between.  So the unfortunate thing is that new mothers don't have the same motivation to keep the house tidy and get themselves "back to normal". 

It's been a real struggle for me. I am frustrated that my body isn't returning to it's old self as quick as I would like it to.  I over did things the first few weeks physically (hard to believe, I mean seriously? Stairs are that bad for you?) and now I may have popped a stitch internally. Jesus Murphy that sucker hurts.

I am happy that I can drive again, although the idea of carting baby and toddler out seems overwhelming. I just need to find my groove again. I remember with the wee farmboy I was incredibly nervous on those first solo trips. So I know it will get easier.

When you are at your grocery store next, and the mom in front of you is juggling a toddler and a baby - please be patient. Smile, and say an encouraging word. It could very well be me.

Friday, December 5, 2014

Baby blues or just recovering?

Don't overdo it.
Take it easy.
Remember to sleep when the baby sleeps.

Apparently the folks who provide advice to mothers post C-section don't have a toddler to deal with at home.  Hubby is beyond fantastic.  I mean, seriously beyond.  I think I am suffering from mild post partum, and I have to push myself to shower and join in the comings and goings of the day.  Fortunately, it's very mild, and I completely adore this new little red headed girl.  (They say that post partum depression can lead to feelings of dislike for the baby - so I am not sure if it's post partum or if I am simply recovering from the surgery and supposed to feel this way.) I simply feel... blah. I can't be motivated to do much. I have absolutely no get up and go which isn't like me.  Everything just seems so overwhelming.

Hubby has been taking on the lion's share of household activities. Making breakfast, taking care of the wee farmboy, tidying up. You name it. He's on it.  Add to that he has been bringing me tea and ensuring that I am comfortable. I am almost at the 4 week mark - and I know if I can make it to 6 weeks I will begin to feel like myself again. 

Right now having a shower seems like such a monumental task. I keep seeing these new mom's on Facebook, all put together with their lipstick on and their hair in place. I am lucky if I manage to get all of the shampoo out of my hair and find a pair of track pants that fit over the incision site.

"Off to my first post baby work out! So excited" - I don't know whether to be jealous or relieved that this isn't in the cards for me. Given how I feel these days I would opt for the latter.

Now excuse me as I curl up on the couch with my tea and my wee girl...and do absolutely nothing.